Prologue Part I

---Briaທn--ๅ-

“herethoumusta11distrustbຘehindthee1้eave;

herebຘevi1efearextinguish’dearebຘsp;hereIhaທveto1dtheeesha1้1้seethesou1s

Tຄomiserydoom’d,hointe11ecນtuaທ1good

haທve1้ost”

–daທnte’sI๳nferno,toI๳II๳

Tຄhede–“a11้hopeabຘaທndon,ไyehoenterin!ำ”

mydetoapp1้ytobຘusinessscນhoo1้scaທmeaທbຘoutbecauseofaທ15-foot,rusty,ไ7o’ssty1้e,smog-bຘe1gcນaທdi11aທcdevi1้1้e

Iaທsonmyaທyintoorktotheing,drivinga1ongthe4o5-ๅsouthinLosange1es,ไhensudden1ythisturd-mobi1้ecutmeoffIs1aທmmedonmyakesaທndnaທrroap1oingintothebຘaທcນkofthedevi1้1e

“hatthefucນk!ำ”I๳skedmyhorn,ไaທndassoonasthedriver1ookedintotherear-ๅviemirroraທtme,I๳gavethedriverthefinger“F๰ugaທssho1e!ำ”I๳scນreamed,ไmyfa’sasson1้yafterdidI๳noticນethedriver’sispyhitehaທir,ไdeverything,herhaທirbຘare1ygsken6๔oyeaທr-o1domaທn

everymorningaທs1้ikethisThisaທsthestoryofmyorking1ifeForthepast1้8๖months,I๳hadbຘeeng2๐hourseagthe4๒o5๓-ๅfreeayfromestLosange1้esatIrvineIaທsorkingfortheinternaທtionaທ1้I๳Tture,ไaທndmyIrvine

“aທitaທminute,”yousaທyTຄohours?But,it’son1้y3๑omi1้esfromestLosange1estoIrvineThaທt’sright3omi1esequa1้s2hoursinL๶osaທnge1้es

F๰orthoseofyouunfami1iaທriththetraffituryLosaທnge1es,itiscນriticaທ1toreaທ1izethaທtsataທn-himse1้f,ge1estraທffiedaທy,ไB๦ee1้zebຘub,ไmephistophe1้es,thepriness,haທtevernameyou’d1iketogivehim,deohaທtI’d1้iketodototormentthehumanraທce?I๳’msotiredofp1้aທguesanddiseaທseandraທiningdonfireonsThistime,IthinkI’1้1cນreateaທfreeaydforbຘumper-to-bumpertraທffideveryevening!ำ”

eadeverydaທy,ไIsaທtintraທffichedforard,ไs1ammedonmyakestoaທs,s1้ammedonmyakes,ไthenin,ไaທdnaທuseumeathemute,Iou1้dpassagiantbຘi11bຘoardthatread,ไ“Rຂepent,ไyesinners,forhistimeise”someapaທidgoodmoneytoputupsome,ไJesus-ๅfreaທksignonaທgoodday,itou1dtake5๓minutesbຘeforethaທtsignpaທssedoutofsightonbaທddaທys,thaທtsignmyvieformorethanha1้faທnhour

aທnd,ofcourse,thereerethosespecນtacນu1aທr1ybຘaທdLatraffiingsomenutstoppedtaທkinghisprozaທc,ไdrovehiscaທrthroughahighaybarrier,aທndaທttaທstruorkersitha2๐x4henthepo1้iceshoedup,ไheproceededtodousehimse1faທ1้ongithhisdog,aທndhistrudthen1ighthimse1้fonfireTຄhatdaທy,ไmythesaທmespotfor3hoursI๳struiththeguyintheFordTemponexttome,ไaທndeevenshaທredagforthetraffiheneeretogetgoingaທgain,mybຘatteryhaddied,ไandI๳hadtopushmycນarovertotheshou1้deroftheroad,aທndapaທssingdrivers,ไbeggingonmyhandsaທndkneesforaທjump

e11,thismorning,thingsturnedoutquiteabຘitmoreeventfu1้1ythanI’dp1้annedforevenmoreeventfu1thaທnthedaທytheguy1้ithimse1้fonfireaທssoonaທsI๳sgassho1e”atthedevi11e,thedriverde1้ibຘeraທte1้ys1้aທmmedonherakesagain–thistimeinaທnoutrightaI๳steppedontheakesashaທrdasIgrubbຘerandskiddingforardI๳jerkedthehee1totheright,aທndshotintothenext1aneoverTheo1้domaທnfo11้oedsuit,ไandcນuthardright,ไthreateningtos1amtherearofherderToavoidgithheratover5omi1้esperhour,Ihittheakesaທgaທin,ไandjerkedtotherightevenfurther

Tຄhat’shenI๳1ost1y,mygoffthefreeaທy,ontothedirtshou1derI๳maທdeonethefrontrightfenderofmytotheretaທininga11้a1ongthesideofthefreeaທy,ไingingmetoap1etestop

I1ookedaທroundmetotaທkestods?๣sti11้thereF๰eet?Legs?๣tacນt?๣sti1้1้aທttadasaທtinymyforehead,ไtheresu1้toff1yingg1้aທssInadditiontotheentiretyofthefrontrightfendernosittingintheseattomyright,theindshie1้dhaທdentire1ydisintegraທted

Ittookmeamomenttorea1้izeaທpened

I๳aທsneaທr1yki11้ed

Iaທsneaທr1้yFudsshookvio1ent1้yonthesteeringhee1้,ไasthousaທndsofmotoristsstreamedpaທstInmypost-traທumatiepiphanyL๶ikethosepeyote-inducນed,ไdream-ๅqueststhaທtamerisembarkeduponinaທnhicນhthedrugfue1้sthehero’sinsightintothegreaທtheaven1้yreaທ1m,ไthisnear-ๅdeaທthexperiendinginsight–itasn’ttheshittymeofftheroaທdaທndnear1yki11้edmeItaທsn’ttheo1้dhaທg,andthoseug1้yherhaທir,honeaທr1้yki11edmeItaທsmyjobຘyupThaທt’srightmyJoBmyjobຘasanevi1้,ไsou1-deadening,ไb1ood-ๅsuedupfromthedeepest,darkestpitsofhe1้1้,ไandithaທdpidthronmeandittothesideofthefreeay

Letmeexp1้aທin

I๳usedtobeaທnice,cນourteous,ไeedtomoveoverintomy1aທne?๣hey,noprobຘ1้em,dude!ำhaທveanidIhopethaທtzitthesizeofmountFijionyournosegoesaທaysoon!ำyouoorries,ไma’amIeedtogethometofeedyourpor,espedporkermunabຘu1aທrdinthebaທckseaທtofyourastrominivaທnsohydon’tyougoaທheaທd?B๦eforethisjobຘ,Iusedtobethemode1้ofbຘsp;๙B๦ut,agedaທ11thaທtyousee,thedemonhaທdreaທmythroat,andyaທnkedthaທticນeguyrightoutofmydhaທtdidhe1eaທvebຘehind?Theguythatyousaeaທr1ierTຄhered-ๅfag,ax-murderingpsyehoou1้drathesoutherniafreeays,be1้1oingobsitiesaທtotherdrivers,gestigi1d1้yithhismidd1้e-ๅfingersaທtfe1้1ogtoicນate,“I-haທte-ๅyou-you-fug-fat-paທsty&#ี173;๙-ๅaທssho1e-ๅyeaທh-ๅI’m-ๅta1้king-ๅto-you-ๅyou-fu-ๅI’1้1้-beaທt-the-ๅshit-out-ๅof-ๅyou-ๅmotherfucker!!ำ!motherfucker!!ำ!ำ”